Unless You give me mercy, I know that I will fail

Have you ever felt like you have been wronged? The pain is awful. The torment even worse. You just think non stop about what “that person” did and how wrong it is. You question their integrity, friendship, etc…

Well, I have for that last several months. Yesterday, I spent most of the day praying, crying, listening to God’s word begging God for justice, for peace, and for rest.

God in His gracious mercy showed me that my focus was wrong. 

God gives grace to the humble and resists the proud.

I am a very proud person. God has graciously showed me these weeks how often I talk about myself. How puffed up I am about what I do and how I do it. Even in ministry. I can proudly think that I draw people to Him. When in reality it is God that draws people to Himself. 

Ministry is hard because it grows you. It teaches you much about your sin. Yet it is super rewarding because it pushes you to your knees and to your Redeemer. 

One of my husband’s favorite songs to hear each morning is “A Morning Prayer”

Oh Lord you are my Lord. I call to you for help. Unless you give me mercy I know that I will fail.

Lord listen to my prayer. Don't hide yourself from me. I lift my hands to you and with all my heart I sing.

You are my strength.  You are my shield. I will praise Your name. 

You are my savior. You are my shepherd. I will trust ¥our name.

Oh Lord you are my Rock. I come to you for help. Unless you give me mercy I know that I will fail. Lord listen to my prayer. Don't hide yourself from me. I lift my hands to you and with all my heart I sing.

You are my strength.  You are my shield. I will praise Your name. 

You are my savior. You are my shepherd. I will trust ¥our name.

The truth is that unless God gives me mercy I will fail. It is easy to judge others actions and to overlook our own sin. True freedom comes in focusing in guarding my heart and my walk with Christ. It is not until I see my sin as God sees it that I can be gracious, kind, and extend forgiveness.